I had heard it before. The moment the words left my mouth I knew what the reaction would. "You're doing WHAT?" "I'm going to my local community college." "A SECULAR college?" "Yep." "Are you sure that's the right thing to do?"
Background Story: I got saved when I was 5. Accepted Jesus as my Savior. That doesn't mean I became a true Christ-Follower (a Christian). I just realized that I was a sinner and that I needed Jesus to save me from Hell and take me to Heaven when I died. I would like to say again that I was 5 years old. That's for all those people out there who don't think children can experience true conviction of sin. But I was not a Christ-Follower. I didn't really think about doing any more than just being "a good kid", which didn't mean much. As a child, I did not do much Christ-Following.
When I was twelve I experienced something new. My mother had never really believed I was saved, because I was in my Awanas class when I prayed. One day my older brother came home from a youth conference. He was more excited than I had ever seen him I think. He had gotten saved at the conference and wanted to get baptized, wanted ALL of us kids to get baptized (we were all saved but none of us had ever been baptized). I'm really glad I was saved by then, because I would have gone along with the whole thing and I might have developed some seriously warped idea of my salvation. Anyway, a few weeks later all of us kids got baptized during the Sunday morning service, oldest to youngest. It was really after that day that I began experiencing a change in my relationship with my Saviour.
I think from what most of that change came was having stronger spiritual leaders. Because I was in an older age group people were starting to expect me to act like an adult. Most importantly I was challenged to make my family's faith, my OWN faith. Unfortunately I ignored that challenge. I had friends who thought differently and I didn't think of Jesus as a person for whom I had to change my whole life. I fell away. I was immersing myself in a very materialistic and sensual world.
I'm glad God got my attention when He did. I sometimes try to imagine what would have happened if He would not have intervened. *shudders* I went to a Christian Youth In Action training camp. The effect was much like throwing a bucket of water on a sleeping person. "WHAT'S GOING ON???" I suddenly saw that God was more of a real, present, interactive person than I had ever imagined.
I attended CYIA for several more years. My second year, when I was 14, I came to important decision. I had been hearing a lot of stories about missionaries. Somehow, the missionaries always figured out that they needed to give their lives to Jesus, to use as HE wanted. I was down in Arkansas at that time and I was walking on a trail in some hills while I thought about it. Another story came to mind I had read several times. A missionary who planted pineapples. A person has to wait years for pineapples to grow. But he waited. When they were ripe the natives stole them. The missionary learned to give the plants to the Lord. Then the missionary's son became ill. The missionary suddenly realized that he had never given his son to the Lord.
As I considered these stories, I realized that I had never given my life to God and I came to a sudden decision. I needed to give my life to God and it needed to happen immediately. I found a bench, sat down and prayed. I told God that I would follow Him anywhere He led me.
This caused changes in my life. Maybe not changes that someone could see (although that would be a hope as well). I now refer to Jesus most often as "Lord". Not "Saviour". Not even "Friend". "Lord. Master. My Ultimate Commander." He is my King. Where He goes, I go. Where He stays, I stay.
I spent all my high school years discovering who my Master is. I still have much more to discover. He has been teaching me the whole time to lean on Him and trust Him, no matter where He took me. I have learned to identify when He was guiding me, answering prayer, comforting me. He gave me my true Joy, by giving my life a better purpose than I could ever give myself.
So is going to a secular college the right move for me? Yes it is, because the Lord led me there. I've heard it said before of soldiers, that if they are in the center of God's will, being in the middle of a battle is safer than walking the streets in the suburbs. Now I DO NOT seriously compare my life with that of my countrymen in uniform. But I will say that if the Lord wants me to go to a secular college, no amount of criticism from atheistic teachers, no deluge of mockery from classmates, no amount of shock from openly immoral lifestyles, could EVER compare with the amount of complete FAILURE that would come to me if I turned tail and ran for a Christian college. I do not care if Christian colleges are great places to be, if the Lord does not want me there I will bring nothing but harm on myself for DISOBEYING a DIRECT ORDER from my MASTER.
After Note : I know some of my friends might remember questioning me on this. I do not want you to think I am angry with you in any way. I know you just want what is best for me :) But the Lord has led me here, so please stop questioning my judgement. Secondly, I know I gave you a horribly long story before getting to the actual point. Sorry :)
I would like to leave you with this verse that has been repeated to me several times in the past weeks.
"For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
