Judge me, O God, and plead my case against an ungodly nation.O deliver me from the deceitful and unjust man, for Thou art the God of my strength, why then do You cast me off?
O send out Thy Light and Thy Truth! Let them lead me! Let them bring me unto Thy holy hill and unto Thy tabernacles! Then will I go unto the alter of God, unto God my exceeding Joy! Yea, upon the harp will I praise Thee O God my God!
Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God! For I shall yet praise Him who is the health of my countenance and my God!
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Joy in Wholesome Talk
I have been bothered for a while about something. Foul language and crude humor. I know that when people's actions bother you the most, it is probably because you recognize that you do those things yourself. I acknowledge that I do struggle with these things, but that I am also making a very determined effort to rid myself of these flaws. But the thought came to me the other day "What in the world is the Lord's stand on these two subjects?" I mean we are TOLD from childhood that the Lord does not want us to use bad language and tell crude jokes. But where EXACTLY is it mentioned? I thank the Lord that He has provided me with friends who spend their time studying the Bible more than I, because in a phone conversation today I had a friend direct me towards the right place. What I found was astounding! I would like to share with you the passage and break it down as I go.
1. "Now this I say and testify in the Lord, that you must no longer walk as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their minds. They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart. They have become callous and have given themselves up to sensuality, greedy to practice every kind of impurity." Ephesians 4: 17-19
You are first told that you should NOT be like those who are unsaved because they literally do not understand what it means to live for God and they do not live for God. Their understanding of the world is incomplete and it is futile, hopeless, to think as they do. They are ignorant, stubborn, their consciences' are seared; they are sensual, greedy and excited to do everything that is wrong. This is not how the Lord wants His children live.
2. "But that is not the way you learned Christ!- assuming you have heard about Him and were taught in Him, as the truth is in Jesus, to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness." 4:20-24
First, this does make a small exemption for those who have not been taught the true way. But in my circle everyone I know has been taught that at least bad language is wrong. So what are you to do? You are told to stop acting like you did before you were saved! That behavior is old, a former manner, corrupt, rotting, with all greedy, unfulfilling desires! Instead you are you try to become like God in all of his righteous and holy characteristics and you are to train your mind to behave 100% differently than it did before.
Are you following me so far? Bad things are things that unsaved people do, and since you have been saved by God you aren't supposed to do bad things, but instead, do good things. Simple, right? But I still have not addressed the specific issue of foul language and crude humor. Well in chapter 2 of this message...
3. "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. .. let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice." 4:29,31
Clear enough? Just in case you wonder what corrupting talk is, its anything that does not build up others, is not fitting for the occasion, and does not give grace to those who hear it. I have never known foul language to be good for building others up, it is improper for nearly all occasions, and it is impossible for foul language to give grace. For myself it gives the kind of feeling you would get if someone were scratching their nails down a chalkboard. It grates terribly.
4. "But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you...let there be no filthiness or foolish talk, nor crude joking, which are out of place..." Ephesians 5:3-4
Could God be any clearer?! That means gay jokes, "that's what she said" jokes, bathroom humor, gossip, sex jokes, crude humor all are out of place and should not even be mentioned!
What are you to replace these things with, as it should be for one who has put on the new man?
"Instead let there be thanksgiving." Ephesians 5:4b
"Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you." Ephesians 4:32
1. "Now this I say and testify in the Lord, that you must no longer walk as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their minds. They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart. They have become callous and have given themselves up to sensuality, greedy to practice every kind of impurity." Ephesians 4: 17-19
You are first told that you should NOT be like those who are unsaved because they literally do not understand what it means to live for God and they do not live for God. Their understanding of the world is incomplete and it is futile, hopeless, to think as they do. They are ignorant, stubborn, their consciences' are seared; they are sensual, greedy and excited to do everything that is wrong. This is not how the Lord wants His children live.
2. "But that is not the way you learned Christ!- assuming you have heard about Him and were taught in Him, as the truth is in Jesus, to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness." 4:20-24
First, this does make a small exemption for those who have not been taught the true way. But in my circle everyone I know has been taught that at least bad language is wrong. So what are you to do? You are told to stop acting like you did before you were saved! That behavior is old, a former manner, corrupt, rotting, with all greedy, unfulfilling desires! Instead you are you try to become like God in all of his righteous and holy characteristics and you are to train your mind to behave 100% differently than it did before.
Are you following me so far? Bad things are things that unsaved people do, and since you have been saved by God you aren't supposed to do bad things, but instead, do good things. Simple, right? But I still have not addressed the specific issue of foul language and crude humor. Well in chapter 2 of this message...
3. "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. .. let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice." 4:29,31
Clear enough? Just in case you wonder what corrupting talk is, its anything that does not build up others, is not fitting for the occasion, and does not give grace to those who hear it. I have never known foul language to be good for building others up, it is improper for nearly all occasions, and it is impossible for foul language to give grace. For myself it gives the kind of feeling you would get if someone were scratching their nails down a chalkboard. It grates terribly.
4. "But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you...let there be no filthiness or foolish talk, nor crude joking, which are out of place..." Ephesians 5:3-4
Could God be any clearer?! That means gay jokes, "that's what she said" jokes, bathroom humor, gossip, sex jokes, crude humor all are out of place and should not even be mentioned!
What are you to replace these things with, as it should be for one who has put on the new man?
"Instead let there be thanksgiving." Ephesians 5:4b
"Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you." Ephesians 4:32
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Joy in NOT Being Happy All The Time
So if you read at least my first blog post you know that I do not believe that when the Lord Jesus commands us to be joyful, that it means we have to be happy all the time. While this is definitely not Scripture, I always love a good sarcastic rant that explains the truth perfectly. Have fun watching!
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Joy's Helper
In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This cornerstone, this solid ground, firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace, when fears are stilled, when strivings cease...
My Comforter, my All in All,
Here in the love of Christ, I stand
There in the ground his body lay,
Light of the World by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious day
up from grave, He rose again!
And as He stands in victory
sin's curse has lost its grip on me!
For I am His and He is mine
bought with the precious blood of Christ!
NO guilt in life, NO fear of death,
this is the power of Christ in me!
From life's first cry to final breath,
JESUS commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man,
can ever pluck me from His hand
Till He returns or calls me home
here in the power of Christ, I'll stand.
Till He returns or calls me home
here in the power of Christ, I'll stand.
He is my light, my strength, my song
This cornerstone, this solid ground, firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace, when fears are stilled, when strivings cease...
My Comforter, my All in All,
Here in the love of Christ, I stand
There in the ground his body lay,
Light of the World by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious day
up from grave, He rose again!
And as He stands in victory
sin's curse has lost its grip on me!
For I am His and He is mine
bought with the precious blood of Christ!
NO guilt in life, NO fear of death,
this is the power of Christ in me!
From life's first cry to final breath,
JESUS commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man,
can ever pluck me from His hand
Till He returns or calls me home
here in the power of Christ, I'll stand.
Till He returns or calls me home
here in the power of Christ, I'll stand.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Joy in Trembling
I heard something a while ago on TV. "The God of the Bible is a God of judgment and punishment." Now I have heard this before in different places and it always bothers me some, but this time it just REALLY got to me.
I've been reading through Jeremiah lately. If a person had access only to that one book in the Bible they might think that my Lord is just a God who likes to punish people. But if they only single out that part of the Bible, they are missing the other parts that stand directly in contrast to this misconception. For example I have found these verses lately that definitely are not describing a God who loves to punish.
"Comfort, yes comfort, My People. Speak tenderly to them...Behold your God!...He will tend His flock like a shepherd; He will gather the lambs in his arms, He will carry them in His bosom, and gently lead those that are with young." Isaiah 40
Sometimes the Lord must discipline His people. Have you ever seen a child misbehaving and NOT wished that their parents would discipline them in some way to make them behave better? In the same way sometimes the Lord must discipline His people in order to make them better. But even when He disciplines, He still loves His children.
"After I have plucked them up, I will again have compassion on them, and I will bring them again each to his heritage, and each to his land." Jeremiah 12:15
But what bothers me the most is when I fail to give voice to this knowledge.
I had a very revealing experience the other week. In my Anatomy class, my teacher was offering extra credit if we students would write up on the board, in front of the class, a list of the different kinds of tissues in the body ect, EXACTLY like he had a few weeks before. I had already tried once before and failed. But I had written down the corrections and had spent an hour the night before class writing and rewriting that list, correcting myself where I got things wrong, forcing myself to recite it perfectly from memory. That morning I tried again. It felt so great because I KNEW I was writing it down perfectly. I had not missed a thing, I just knew it. Well, my teacher had to critique it in front of the class. I stood right in front of him, arms crossed waiting for him to tell me I had done it right. I was experiencing this great amount of emotional turmoil and I remember thinking "If he says I got something wrong I'm gonna break down and cry in front of the whole class." But the great thing was that my whole body was TREMBLING because I KNEW I had done it right and that he could not find any fault with what I had done. It was rather exciting. :)
Anyway, whatever thoughts were passing through my head were not being clearly interpreted through my body language. Because, my teacher looked at me (and I have no idea what kind of look I had on my face) and whatever he saw made him say " I have this feeling...that if I tell you this is wrong..... you will throw something at me." Then he said it again......and again...and finally he said "I feel like I need to leave the room if I don't want to get hurt!" It was rather funny to watch, because that wasn't what I was feeling at all. :)
Anyway, he critiqued my work. It as perfect just like I thought it was. I got the extra credit. I was elated for the rest of the day. Then a thought struck me:
I had knowledge. I had reviewed and studied that knowledge until I knew it backwards and forwards. I knew everything about it. I knew it was trustworthy knowledge. And knowing that I knew it, made me excited, made my body TREMBLE with the assurance that I was right. This assurance filled my body and gave me such a great amount of confidence I was daring the professor in my mind to find anything wrong with my work. This confidence came through in my manner, my stance, my gaze and it literally made my professor cower before me (and by the end of his critique if he had found something wrong he really might have gotten something thrown at him).
The point I want to get across is this: if I can be that confidant about something as ordinary as the tissues of the human body, why can that overwhelming confidence not come through when I am speaking about my Lord Jesus? When I hear someone tearing down my Lord and Saviour, why does my stance not become taller, my arms cross, my body start trembling with the mere thought that I have the Knowledge of my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ who "is not willing for any to perish, but for all to come to repentance"? The Lord who has loved you with an "everlasting love and has made you with lovingkindness"? The Lord who got so heartbroken over punishing the children He loves so much that He sent His own Son to die for not only His children, but all the people in the world, thereby having their sins forgiven so that they would no longer be punished and be taken away to be with Him in Paradise forever? WHY does this overwhelming, exciting, trembling confidence not come through in my conversation?
Your smile is always shining out,
and they know what its all about :)
It's not hard for them to figure out
the way you show Jesus :)
You know LOVE is what they heard
and you didn't even say a word!
Ain't it funny, that's the way it works
when you know Jesus :)
Oh, it's like flipping on the light switch when you're walking into the room!
You're so undeniable! The way you SHOW HIM!
Jamie Grace, Show Jesus
HERE is a trustworthy saying that deserves to be fully accepted: Jesus Christ came into the world to SAVE sinners- of whom I am the worst! But it is for THAT VERY REASON that I was shown MERCY so that in me, the WORST of sinners, Christ might display His IMMENSE patience as an EXAMPLE for those who would believe in Him and receive eternal life! Now to the King, Eternal, Immortal, Invisible, the Only God, be honor and glory forever and ever!! Amen! 1 Timothy 1:15-17
I've been reading through Jeremiah lately. If a person had access only to that one book in the Bible they might think that my Lord is just a God who likes to punish people. But if they only single out that part of the Bible, they are missing the other parts that stand directly in contrast to this misconception. For example I have found these verses lately that definitely are not describing a God who loves to punish.
"Comfort, yes comfort, My People. Speak tenderly to them...Behold your God!...He will tend His flock like a shepherd; He will gather the lambs in his arms, He will carry them in His bosom, and gently lead those that are with young." Isaiah 40
Sometimes the Lord must discipline His people. Have you ever seen a child misbehaving and NOT wished that their parents would discipline them in some way to make them behave better? In the same way sometimes the Lord must discipline His people in order to make them better. But even when He disciplines, He still loves His children.
"After I have plucked them up, I will again have compassion on them, and I will bring them again each to his heritage, and each to his land." Jeremiah 12:15
But what bothers me the most is when I fail to give voice to this knowledge.
I had a very revealing experience the other week. In my Anatomy class, my teacher was offering extra credit if we students would write up on the board, in front of the class, a list of the different kinds of tissues in the body ect, EXACTLY like he had a few weeks before. I had already tried once before and failed. But I had written down the corrections and had spent an hour the night before class writing and rewriting that list, correcting myself where I got things wrong, forcing myself to recite it perfectly from memory. That morning I tried again. It felt so great because I KNEW I was writing it down perfectly. I had not missed a thing, I just knew it. Well, my teacher had to critique it in front of the class. I stood right in front of him, arms crossed waiting for him to tell me I had done it right. I was experiencing this great amount of emotional turmoil and I remember thinking "If he says I got something wrong I'm gonna break down and cry in front of the whole class." But the great thing was that my whole body was TREMBLING because I KNEW I had done it right and that he could not find any fault with what I had done. It was rather exciting. :)
Anyway, whatever thoughts were passing through my head were not being clearly interpreted through my body language. Because, my teacher looked at me (and I have no idea what kind of look I had on my face) and whatever he saw made him say " I have this feeling...that if I tell you this is wrong..... you will throw something at me." Then he said it again......and again...and finally he said "I feel like I need to leave the room if I don't want to get hurt!" It was rather funny to watch, because that wasn't what I was feeling at all. :)
Anyway, he critiqued my work. It as perfect just like I thought it was. I got the extra credit. I was elated for the rest of the day. Then a thought struck me:
I had knowledge. I had reviewed and studied that knowledge until I knew it backwards and forwards. I knew everything about it. I knew it was trustworthy knowledge. And knowing that I knew it, made me excited, made my body TREMBLE with the assurance that I was right. This assurance filled my body and gave me such a great amount of confidence I was daring the professor in my mind to find anything wrong with my work. This confidence came through in my manner, my stance, my gaze and it literally made my professor cower before me (and by the end of his critique if he had found something wrong he really might have gotten something thrown at him).
The point I want to get across is this: if I can be that confidant about something as ordinary as the tissues of the human body, why can that overwhelming confidence not come through when I am speaking about my Lord Jesus? When I hear someone tearing down my Lord and Saviour, why does my stance not become taller, my arms cross, my body start trembling with the mere thought that I have the Knowledge of my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ who "is not willing for any to perish, but for all to come to repentance"? The Lord who has loved you with an "everlasting love and has made you with lovingkindness"? The Lord who got so heartbroken over punishing the children He loves so much that He sent His own Son to die for not only His children, but all the people in the world, thereby having their sins forgiven so that they would no longer be punished and be taken away to be with Him in Paradise forever? WHY does this overwhelming, exciting, trembling confidence not come through in my conversation?
Your smile is always shining out,
and they know what its all about :)
It's not hard for them to figure out
the way you show Jesus :)
You know LOVE is what they heard
and you didn't even say a word!
Ain't it funny, that's the way it works
when you know Jesus :)
Oh, it's like flipping on the light switch when you're walking into the room!
You're so undeniable! The way you SHOW HIM!
Jamie Grace, Show Jesus
HERE is a trustworthy saying that deserves to be fully accepted: Jesus Christ came into the world to SAVE sinners- of whom I am the worst! But it is for THAT VERY REASON that I was shown MERCY so that in me, the WORST of sinners, Christ might display His IMMENSE patience as an EXAMPLE for those who would believe in Him and receive eternal life! Now to the King, Eternal, Immortal, Invisible, the Only God, be honor and glory forever and ever!! Amen! 1 Timothy 1:15-17
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Joy in Shame
I know I need you....I need to love you. I love to see you, but its been so long. I long to feel you. I feel this need for you and I need to hear you. Is that so wrong...
Now you pull me near you. When we are close, I fear you. Still I'm afraid to tell you all that I have done. Are you done forgiving? Or can you look past my pretending? Lord, I'm so tired of defending what I have become. What have I become....
And I hear you say "My love is over, it's underneath, it's inside, it's in between. The times you doubt me, when you can't feel, the times you question 'Is this for real?' The times that you're broken. The times that you mend. The times you hate me and the times that you bend. Well, my love is over, it's underneath, it's inside, it's in between. These times you're healing and when your heart breaks. The times that you feel like you are falling from grace. The times you're hurting. The times that you heal. The times you go hungry and are tempted to steal. In times of confusion, in chaos and pain, I'm there in your sorrow under the weight of your shame. I'm there through the heartache. I'm there in the storm. My Love, I will keep you by My power alone. I don't care where you fall or where you have been. I'll never forsake you because My love never ends."
"It never ends...."
Now you pull me near you. When we are close, I fear you. Still I'm afraid to tell you all that I have done. Are you done forgiving? Or can you look past my pretending? Lord, I'm so tired of defending what I have become. What have I become....
And I hear you say "My love is over, it's underneath, it's inside, it's in between. The times you doubt me, when you can't feel, the times you question 'Is this for real?' The times that you're broken. The times that you mend. The times you hate me and the times that you bend. Well, my love is over, it's underneath, it's inside, it's in between. These times you're healing and when your heart breaks. The times that you feel like you are falling from grace. The times you're hurting. The times that you heal. The times you go hungry and are tempted to steal. In times of confusion, in chaos and pain, I'm there in your sorrow under the weight of your shame. I'm there through the heartache. I'm there in the storm. My Love, I will keep you by My power alone. I don't care where you fall or where you have been. I'll never forsake you because My love never ends."
"It never ends...."
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Joy in Separateness
While doing my devotionals yesterday I was looking for this passage. I looked for a while but couldn't find it. Today, in the very next chapter of my devotionals, I found it. LOL.
I will make my dwelling among them
and walk among them
and I will be their God
and they shall be My people.
Therefore go out from their midst,
and be separate from them,
says the Lord,
and touch no unclean thing;
then I will welcome you
and you shall be sons and daughters to Me,
says the Lord Almighty.
~2 Corinthians 6:16b-18
I will make my dwelling among them
and walk among them
and I will be their God
and they shall be My people.
Therefore go out from their midst,
and be separate from them,
says the Lord,
and touch no unclean thing;
then I will welcome you
and you shall be sons and daughters to Me,
says the Lord Almighty.
~2 Corinthians 6:16b-18
Monday, October 31, 2011
Joy in a Jumbled Up Random String of Thoughts :)
Thought #1.
Is it really November? Is the term really more than half-way over? These past two months have been the strangest I have ever lived I think. My life feels a little like it has been stuck in time and everything and everyone else is flowing past it and I am moving neither forward or backward in it. Joy.
Thought #2.
"Through many dangers, toils and snares I have already come,
'Tis Grace hath brought me safe thus far and Grace will lead me home!" JOY!
Thought #3.
These past two months I have learned about people, right and wrong (yes I am saying that seriously), standing up for my beliefs, making the right friends, and learning to depend on the Lord for everything ever day (and in this last instance I am still miserably failing). Joy.
Thought #4.
I was sheltered growing up. I am glad. If I was not my personality would be seriously warped right now (and it already is anyway). There’s a ton of evil things, bad things and stupid things in this world and I am glad I did not have to deal with most of them growing up. Joy.
Thought #5.
Christian Leading is needed. Not Christian Leaders, Christian Leading. That just means you and me doing what is right. Andrew Jackson said “One man with courage makes a majority.” It is mostly true. A lot of people are just waiting for someone to tell them what to do. So tell them what the right thing is. Sure sometimes people will think you are stupid. But guess what? You, as a Christ-follower, are working for the God who uses the “foolish things of the world to confound the wise”. It’s in the job description. Joy.
Thought #6.
Jesus is with you. Constantly. All the time. Isn’t that just the coolest idea ever?!! Joy.
Thought #7.
The Lord gives Christ-followers a new family to encourage and build up each other. We are all here for each other. Do not neglect this incredibly positive system. Even spending just a few short hours with my church family, both home church and far-flung, gave my spirit the refreshment it needed to finish out this semester. Big Joy Plus J
Friday, September 30, 2011
Joy in Vision
Be Thou my vision, Oh Lord of my heart
Naught be all else to me save that Thou art
Thou my best thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light
Be Thou my wisdom and Thou my true Word
I ever with Thee and Thou with me Lord
Thou my great Father and I Thy true son
Thou in me dwelling and I with Thee, ONE
Riches I heed not, nor man's empty praise
Thou my inheritance, now and always
Thou and Thou only first in my heart!
High King of Heaven, My Treasure Thou art!
Be Thou my vision, Oh Lord of my heart
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art
Thou my best thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light!
High King of Heaven my victory won!
May I reach Heaven's joy, bright Heaven's Son!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall!
Still be my Vision, Oh Ruler of All
Still be my Vision, Oh Ruler of All!
Naught be all else to me save that Thou art
Thou my best thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light
Be Thou my wisdom and Thou my true Word
I ever with Thee and Thou with me Lord
Thou my great Father and I Thy true son
Thou in me dwelling and I with Thee, ONE
Riches I heed not, nor man's empty praise
Thou my inheritance, now and always
Thou and Thou only first in my heart!
High King of Heaven, My Treasure Thou art!
Be Thou my vision, Oh Lord of my heart
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art
Thou my best thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light!
High King of Heaven my victory won!
May I reach Heaven's joy, bright Heaven's Son!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall!
Still be my Vision, Oh Ruler of All
Still be my Vision, Oh Ruler of All!
Friday, September 23, 2011
Joy in ( A Little Bit Of) Adversity
I have been in college for five weeks now. It is very different from what I expected it to be. Of course, that is not a new perception :)
First of all, I can confess to being a bit deceived about secular colleges being a hotbed of liberal thinkers and atheists. Well, universities and such may be like that, but I am attending a simple community college deep in the Bible Belt. I have been pleasantly surprised to find that most of my professors have conservative, logical world views. For example, I have been overjoyed in my Anatomy class to hear my professor proclaim in almost every class session that we, as humans, are too complex to not be Designed, and often makes references to humans having a Great Designer. While I may not draw a direct correlation to his belief in God from this, at least I do not have to sit through a two hour lecture on why we came from monkeys.
Second, I am finding college a little harder than I expected. Not that the classes or homework are hard, but I have discovered I have to filter everything I am taught. That can be exhausting at times. I am used to having a Christian curriculum that I can trust to teach me what is right (but trusting such teaching implicitly can be a bad thing too). Now? I think the people who wrote my history book really hated everything early Americans did to build this nation. Truly I feel almost like I am reading propaganda against the U.S. Luckily my teacher presents a much better view of it (it's actually my favorite class), but when I read the textbook I find my mind rebelling against what is written.
The only place I am encountering any kind of.... well, views radically different from my own is in my Sociology class. I think most of that is the class is more open discussion than closed instruction by the professor. Still I find that I do not like my professor or what I am being taught. I think it is because I have no knowledge when it comes to sociology, I have never been taught the Christian world view of sociology, and therefore have no way of sifting what I am taught to discover what is right and wrong. This is frustrating to me because if I have no way of knowing if something is right or wrong I tend to turn away from it completely. But I know that by learning sociology I can obtain tools that will equip me to defend my faith and strengthen others faith. So right now I am stuck in a quandary. I am hoping to obtain sociology books written from a Christian perspective so that I can get over this frustrating state I am in right now.
Last, I know some people were worried that I was attending a secular college. Despite the few difficulties I am encountering, I can now say with perfect confidence that the Lord knew what He was doing when he led me here. It is a perfect fit and exactly what I need, not only to earn my degree, but also to learn how to share my faith, which is much more important than any other thing I can learn. Being out in the world with people who think my faith is laughable, and sometimes even at my work, makes me value the time that I spend in the Bible and with other Christians all the more. That is my Joy.
One song I have been listening to accurately sums up what I have been thinking these past few weeks. It was written by Barlow Girl and is (allegedly) based on a quote a man wrote on a wall in a concentration camp.
Thought I can't see my story's ending
that doesn't mean the dark night has no end!
It's only here that I find faith
and learn to trust the One who writes my days.
So I'll stand in the pain and the silence
and I'll speak to the dark night:
I believe in the sun
even when its not shining
I believe in love
even when I can't feel it
I believe in God
even when He is silent
No dark can consume light!
No death greater than this life!
We are not forgotten!
Hope is found when we say:
Even when He is silent
I believe in the sun
even when its not shining
I believe in love
even when I can't feel it
I, I believe in God
First of all, I can confess to being a bit deceived about secular colleges being a hotbed of liberal thinkers and atheists. Well, universities and such may be like that, but I am attending a simple community college deep in the Bible Belt. I have been pleasantly surprised to find that most of my professors have conservative, logical world views. For example, I have been overjoyed in my Anatomy class to hear my professor proclaim in almost every class session that we, as humans, are too complex to not be Designed, and often makes references to humans having a Great Designer. While I may not draw a direct correlation to his belief in God from this, at least I do not have to sit through a two hour lecture on why we came from monkeys.
Second, I am finding college a little harder than I expected. Not that the classes or homework are hard, but I have discovered I have to filter everything I am taught. That can be exhausting at times. I am used to having a Christian curriculum that I can trust to teach me what is right (but trusting such teaching implicitly can be a bad thing too). Now? I think the people who wrote my history book really hated everything early Americans did to build this nation. Truly I feel almost like I am reading propaganda against the U.S. Luckily my teacher presents a much better view of it (it's actually my favorite class), but when I read the textbook I find my mind rebelling against what is written.
The only place I am encountering any kind of.... well, views radically different from my own is in my Sociology class. I think most of that is the class is more open discussion than closed instruction by the professor. Still I find that I do not like my professor or what I am being taught. I think it is because I have no knowledge when it comes to sociology, I have never been taught the Christian world view of sociology, and therefore have no way of sifting what I am taught to discover what is right and wrong. This is frustrating to me because if I have no way of knowing if something is right or wrong I tend to turn away from it completely. But I know that by learning sociology I can obtain tools that will equip me to defend my faith and strengthen others faith. So right now I am stuck in a quandary. I am hoping to obtain sociology books written from a Christian perspective so that I can get over this frustrating state I am in right now.
Last, I know some people were worried that I was attending a secular college. Despite the few difficulties I am encountering, I can now say with perfect confidence that the Lord knew what He was doing when he led me here. It is a perfect fit and exactly what I need, not only to earn my degree, but also to learn how to share my faith, which is much more important than any other thing I can learn. Being out in the world with people who think my faith is laughable, and sometimes even at my work, makes me value the time that I spend in the Bible and with other Christians all the more. That is my Joy.
One song I have been listening to accurately sums up what I have been thinking these past few weeks. It was written by Barlow Girl and is (allegedly) based on a quote a man wrote on a wall in a concentration camp.
Thought I can't see my story's ending
that doesn't mean the dark night has no end!
It's only here that I find faith
and learn to trust the One who writes my days.
So I'll stand in the pain and the silence
and I'll speak to the dark night:
I believe in the sun
even when its not shining
I believe in love
even when I can't feel it
I believe in God
even when He is silent
No dark can consume light!
No death greater than this life!
We are not forgotten!
Hope is found when we say:
Even when He is silent
I believe in the sun
even when its not shining
I believe in love
even when I can't feel it
I, I believe in God
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Joy in ( A Little Bit Of ) Opposition
I had heard it before. The moment the words left my mouth I knew what the reaction would. "You're doing WHAT?" "I'm going to my local community college." "A SECULAR college?" "Yep." "Are you sure that's the right thing to do?"
Background Story: I got saved when I was 5. Accepted Jesus as my Savior. That doesn't mean I became a true Christ-Follower (a Christian). I just realized that I was a sinner and that I needed Jesus to save me from Hell and take me to Heaven when I died. I would like to say again that I was 5 years old. That's for all those people out there who don't think children can experience true conviction of sin. But I was not a Christ-Follower. I didn't really think about doing any more than just being "a good kid", which didn't mean much. As a child, I did not do much Christ-Following.
When I was twelve I experienced something new. My mother had never really believed I was saved, because I was in my Awanas class when I prayed. One day my older brother came home from a youth conference. He was more excited than I had ever seen him I think. He had gotten saved at the conference and wanted to get baptized, wanted ALL of us kids to get baptized (we were all saved but none of us had ever been baptized). I'm really glad I was saved by then, because I would have gone along with the whole thing and I might have developed some seriously warped idea of my salvation. Anyway, a few weeks later all of us kids got baptized during the Sunday morning service, oldest to youngest. It was really after that day that I began experiencing a change in my relationship with my Saviour.
I think from what most of that change came was having stronger spiritual leaders. Because I was in an older age group people were starting to expect me to act like an adult. Most importantly I was challenged to make my family's faith, my OWN faith. Unfortunately I ignored that challenge. I had friends who thought differently and I didn't think of Jesus as a person for whom I had to change my whole life. I fell away. I was immersing myself in a very materialistic and sensual world.
I'm glad God got my attention when He did. I sometimes try to imagine what would have happened if He would not have intervened. *shudders* I went to a Christian Youth In Action training camp. The effect was much like throwing a bucket of water on a sleeping person. "WHAT'S GOING ON???" I suddenly saw that God was more of a real, present, interactive person than I had ever imagined.
I attended CYIA for several more years. My second year, when I was 14, I came to important decision. I had been hearing a lot of stories about missionaries. Somehow, the missionaries always figured out that they needed to give their lives to Jesus, to use as HE wanted. I was down in Arkansas at that time and I was walking on a trail in some hills while I thought about it. Another story came to mind I had read several times. A missionary who planted pineapples. A person has to wait years for pineapples to grow. But he waited. When they were ripe the natives stole them. The missionary learned to give the plants to the Lord. Then the missionary's son became ill. The missionary suddenly realized that he had never given his son to the Lord.
As I considered these stories, I realized that I had never given my life to God and I came to a sudden decision. I needed to give my life to God and it needed to happen immediately. I found a bench, sat down and prayed. I told God that I would follow Him anywhere He led me.
This caused changes in my life. Maybe not changes that someone could see (although that would be a hope as well). I now refer to Jesus most often as "Lord". Not "Saviour". Not even "Friend". "Lord. Master. My Ultimate Commander." He is my King. Where He goes, I go. Where He stays, I stay.
I spent all my high school years discovering who my Master is. I still have much more to discover. He has been teaching me the whole time to lean on Him and trust Him, no matter where He took me. I have learned to identify when He was guiding me, answering prayer, comforting me. He gave me my true Joy, by giving my life a better purpose than I could ever give myself.
So is going to a secular college the right move for me? Yes it is, because the Lord led me there. I've heard it said before of soldiers, that if they are in the center of God's will, being in the middle of a battle is safer than walking the streets in the suburbs. Now I DO NOT seriously compare my life with that of my countrymen in uniform. But I will say that if the Lord wants me to go to a secular college, no amount of criticism from atheistic teachers, no deluge of mockery from classmates, no amount of shock from openly immoral lifestyles, could EVER compare with the amount of complete FAILURE that would come to me if I turned tail and ran for a Christian college. I do not care if Christian colleges are great places to be, if the Lord does not want me there I will bring nothing but harm on myself for DISOBEYING a DIRECT ORDER from my MASTER.
After Note : I know some of my friends might remember questioning me on this. I do not want you to think I am angry with you in any way. I know you just want what is best for me :) But the Lord has led me here, so please stop questioning my judgement. Secondly, I know I gave you a horribly long story before getting to the actual point. Sorry :)
I would like to leave you with this verse that has been repeated to me several times in the past weeks.
"For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
Background Story: I got saved when I was 5. Accepted Jesus as my Savior. That doesn't mean I became a true Christ-Follower (a Christian). I just realized that I was a sinner and that I needed Jesus to save me from Hell and take me to Heaven when I died. I would like to say again that I was 5 years old. That's for all those people out there who don't think children can experience true conviction of sin. But I was not a Christ-Follower. I didn't really think about doing any more than just being "a good kid", which didn't mean much. As a child, I did not do much Christ-Following.
When I was twelve I experienced something new. My mother had never really believed I was saved, because I was in my Awanas class when I prayed. One day my older brother came home from a youth conference. He was more excited than I had ever seen him I think. He had gotten saved at the conference and wanted to get baptized, wanted ALL of us kids to get baptized (we were all saved but none of us had ever been baptized). I'm really glad I was saved by then, because I would have gone along with the whole thing and I might have developed some seriously warped idea of my salvation. Anyway, a few weeks later all of us kids got baptized during the Sunday morning service, oldest to youngest. It was really after that day that I began experiencing a change in my relationship with my Saviour.
I think from what most of that change came was having stronger spiritual leaders. Because I was in an older age group people were starting to expect me to act like an adult. Most importantly I was challenged to make my family's faith, my OWN faith. Unfortunately I ignored that challenge. I had friends who thought differently and I didn't think of Jesus as a person for whom I had to change my whole life. I fell away. I was immersing myself in a very materialistic and sensual world.
I'm glad God got my attention when He did. I sometimes try to imagine what would have happened if He would not have intervened. *shudders* I went to a Christian Youth In Action training camp. The effect was much like throwing a bucket of water on a sleeping person. "WHAT'S GOING ON???" I suddenly saw that God was more of a real, present, interactive person than I had ever imagined.
I attended CYIA for several more years. My second year, when I was 14, I came to important decision. I had been hearing a lot of stories about missionaries. Somehow, the missionaries always figured out that they needed to give their lives to Jesus, to use as HE wanted. I was down in Arkansas at that time and I was walking on a trail in some hills while I thought about it. Another story came to mind I had read several times. A missionary who planted pineapples. A person has to wait years for pineapples to grow. But he waited. When they were ripe the natives stole them. The missionary learned to give the plants to the Lord. Then the missionary's son became ill. The missionary suddenly realized that he had never given his son to the Lord.
As I considered these stories, I realized that I had never given my life to God and I came to a sudden decision. I needed to give my life to God and it needed to happen immediately. I found a bench, sat down and prayed. I told God that I would follow Him anywhere He led me.
This caused changes in my life. Maybe not changes that someone could see (although that would be a hope as well). I now refer to Jesus most often as "Lord". Not "Saviour". Not even "Friend". "Lord. Master. My Ultimate Commander." He is my King. Where He goes, I go. Where He stays, I stay.
I spent all my high school years discovering who my Master is. I still have much more to discover. He has been teaching me the whole time to lean on Him and trust Him, no matter where He took me. I have learned to identify when He was guiding me, answering prayer, comforting me. He gave me my true Joy, by giving my life a better purpose than I could ever give myself.
So is going to a secular college the right move for me? Yes it is, because the Lord led me there. I've heard it said before of soldiers, that if they are in the center of God's will, being in the middle of a battle is safer than walking the streets in the suburbs. Now I DO NOT seriously compare my life with that of my countrymen in uniform. But I will say that if the Lord wants me to go to a secular college, no amount of criticism from atheistic teachers, no deluge of mockery from classmates, no amount of shock from openly immoral lifestyles, could EVER compare with the amount of complete FAILURE that would come to me if I turned tail and ran for a Christian college. I do not care if Christian colleges are great places to be, if the Lord does not want me there I will bring nothing but harm on myself for DISOBEYING a DIRECT ORDER from my MASTER.
After Note : I know some of my friends might remember questioning me on this. I do not want you to think I am angry with you in any way. I know you just want what is best for me :) But the Lord has led me here, so please stop questioning my judgement. Secondly, I know I gave you a horribly long story before getting to the actual point. Sorry :)
I would like to leave you with this verse that has been repeated to me several times in the past weeks.
"For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Joy Through Anger
I must admit, I am a person of passion. I can be passionately happy, passionately sad, passionately loving, and passionately angry. I am one of those people who tends to act and react, not think things through, so I find I must constantly be keeping my anger in check. I am ashamed of my angry moments and I tend to ignore them. I think that happens in all of our lives as well. Anger is something that is natural to every human being and yet it is one of those things that we try to completely forget about. We try to avoid all mention of it. I'm sure everyone at one point or another has been in some sort of angry passion and had someone ask "why are you so angry" or declare "you are angry right now". But then what do we often say? That's right, "No I am NOT angry!" (and do not forget that you are yelling this). I think though, that to discover more about the true Joy of the Lord one must explore all areas of one's behavior, even one's own anger.
I must admit that for the past two weeks I was angry with God. It was the most painful thing I've experienced in my life yet. God took away something from my life this year. I could not understand at first why He did it. I kept asking "Lord, why would You take something away from me that makes me so happy? That teaches me more about You? Why must Your plan for me include hurting me like this?" I was miserable. I knew, in my head I knew, that the Lord can do whatever hurtful thing He wants to me, because I have given my life to Him. I knew, in my head I knew, that He was teaching me to refocus my priorities on what was truly important in my life. There were nights when all I could do was sit in my bed, cry, and ask "Why Lord? Why?" I knew all the answers in my head, but they were having a hard time making it to my heart. Then I went to a girl's camp, to be a counselor. At the beginning of the week I wondered if I even had any right to be there. I felt so dead in my soul. I did not feel like talking about the Lord at all. I know the Joy was there, but it was one of those times when it was buried deep, deep down in my heart.
At one point I had an out-of-mind experience, if I may call it that. I was sitting there at the camp and I said to myself "Ok, you are hurting. You think God has hurt you and you don't know if you can trust Him anymore. But you know that God has a reason for everything and you KNOW that this is going to help you. I know you can't FEEL it right now, but you KNOW that Jesus is still there and He knows exactly what He is doing with your life."
A few months ago I was going through a rough patch. It was one of those silly rough patches where you know everything wrong that happened, happened because you made some dumb decisions. I had my good friend, Cathleen, praying for me and one day she gave me a CD with a compilation of songs that she found inspiring when she was having bad days. One song by Michelle Tumes particularly struck me.
I've found Love
I've found Peace in my life
I've found Joy that no one can describe
When I lay down to sleep
there's a voice inside keeps tell me
Something that I ought to do
You've gotta hold on to Jesus
when your heart is crying
your world is dying
Hold onto Jesus
when your life had had enough
I've had pain and like everyone else
I've been tempted to only live for myself
but when I lay down to sleep
there's a voice inside
keeps telling me
something that I ought to do
You've gotta hold onto Jesus
when your heart is crying
your world is dying
hold onto Jesus
when your life has had enough
And as time goes by
the tick of the clock is not enough for me
And as time goes by
I'll give Jesus my allegiance
Cuz you and me
we've gotta hold on
hold on to Jesus
Now when I have problems this song comes to mind. This week, in the midst of my pain and anger I remembered this song. And I finally said, "Hold on Cathy. No matter what happens, no matter how much it hurts when Jesus is breaking you, you gotta hold on to Jesus, because when you finally come out on the other side of this, you are going to have a beautiful ending." Then I picked up my Bible for the first time in ten days, bowed my head and prayed. I finally reconciled with God. Right now I am trying to learn how to trust Him again. I feel like I lost a lot of ground this week. I feel like I will never be the same after this. My only hope is that through all this change, the Lord will make something even more beautiful and God-honoring of my life. That was my Joy this week.
I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ and be found in Him...the righteousness which is of God by faith: that I may know Him, and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowships of His sufferings...this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus - Philippians 3: 8,10,13-14
I must admit that for the past two weeks I was angry with God. It was the most painful thing I've experienced in my life yet. God took away something from my life this year. I could not understand at first why He did it. I kept asking "Lord, why would You take something away from me that makes me so happy? That teaches me more about You? Why must Your plan for me include hurting me like this?" I was miserable. I knew, in my head I knew, that the Lord can do whatever hurtful thing He wants to me, because I have given my life to Him. I knew, in my head I knew, that He was teaching me to refocus my priorities on what was truly important in my life. There were nights when all I could do was sit in my bed, cry, and ask "Why Lord? Why?" I knew all the answers in my head, but they were having a hard time making it to my heart. Then I went to a girl's camp, to be a counselor. At the beginning of the week I wondered if I even had any right to be there. I felt so dead in my soul. I did not feel like talking about the Lord at all. I know the Joy was there, but it was one of those times when it was buried deep, deep down in my heart.
At one point I had an out-of-mind experience, if I may call it that. I was sitting there at the camp and I said to myself "Ok, you are hurting. You think God has hurt you and you don't know if you can trust Him anymore. But you know that God has a reason for everything and you KNOW that this is going to help you. I know you can't FEEL it right now, but you KNOW that Jesus is still there and He knows exactly what He is doing with your life."
A few months ago I was going through a rough patch. It was one of those silly rough patches where you know everything wrong that happened, happened because you made some dumb decisions. I had my good friend, Cathleen, praying for me and one day she gave me a CD with a compilation of songs that she found inspiring when she was having bad days. One song by Michelle Tumes particularly struck me.
I've found Love
I've found Peace in my life
I've found Joy that no one can describe
When I lay down to sleep
there's a voice inside keeps tell me
Something that I ought to do
You've gotta hold on to Jesus
when your heart is crying
your world is dying
Hold onto Jesus
when your life had had enough
I've had pain and like everyone else
I've been tempted to only live for myself
but when I lay down to sleep
there's a voice inside
keeps telling me
something that I ought to do
You've gotta hold onto Jesus
when your heart is crying
your world is dying
hold onto Jesus
when your life has had enough
And as time goes by
the tick of the clock is not enough for me
And as time goes by
I'll give Jesus my allegiance
Cuz you and me
we've gotta hold on
hold on to Jesus
Now when I have problems this song comes to mind. This week, in the midst of my pain and anger I remembered this song. And I finally said, "Hold on Cathy. No matter what happens, no matter how much it hurts when Jesus is breaking you, you gotta hold on to Jesus, because when you finally come out on the other side of this, you are going to have a beautiful ending." Then I picked up my Bible for the first time in ten days, bowed my head and prayed. I finally reconciled with God. Right now I am trying to learn how to trust Him again. I feel like I lost a lot of ground this week. I feel like I will never be the same after this. My only hope is that through all this change, the Lord will make something even more beautiful and God-honoring of my life. That was my Joy this week.
I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ and be found in Him...the righteousness which is of God by faith: that I may know Him, and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowships of His sufferings...this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus - Philippians 3: 8,10,13-14
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
What is Joy?
I was in Kansas City this past weekend teaching a VBS with a friend. We played games, told, stories, and (of course) sang many songs. The second day of VBS I taught the children one of my favorite songs, called the I've Got Joy song.
I've got Joy down in my heart
Deep, deep down in my heart
J-O-Y down in my heart
Deep, deep down in my heart
Jesus gave it to me and no one can destroy it
I've got Joy down in my heart
Deep, deep down in my heart
It is part of my training to not only sing the songs with the children, but also to discuss what they mean. So I asked the children "what does it mean to have Joy?"
I ask you as well my reader. "What does it mean to have Joy?" Does it mean to always be happy all the time? That is ridiculous. No one can be happy all the time and no one can know that better than I. If you ask any of my friends who the happiest person they know is, they will probably say my name. But even I am not happy all the time. It is simply not possible to live in a world with sin and death and not be unhappy sometimes. Besides how can a Lord who commands us to "be joyful" (Psalm 149:5) also command us to "weep with those who weep" (Romans 12:15)? No, to have Joy is not to be happy all the time but this is the false idea that pervades our entire world.
My reader, you might also consider from whom the command to be Joyful comes. It comes from the Lord Jesus. Yet there are times in the Scriptures when it is readily apparent that Jesus is not happy. Even Jesus was sad, grieved, or righteously angry. He was not happy all the time. Yet He commands us to have Joy. So does this mean that Jesus commands His children to do something that was impossible for God Himself? Or is it rather that we do not fully understand what it means to have true Joy? Knowing that for the Lord "All things are possible" (Matthew 19:26) I think that we just do not fully understand what it means to have true Joy.
So I ask you again "what does it mean to have Joy"? To be honest, I have heard many explanations of it in my life and I still have not figured it out. My hope for this blog is to search for the true Joy of the Lord. But I will leave you with the explanation I gave to the children I was teaching that night. To be Joyful is to be content with your circumstances, knowing that because you have been saved by God's Grace, no matter what horrible, painful or happy things you experience here on earth, you have been promised that when you die you will be taken to Heaven, the Perfect place. Sometimes to be Joyful is to be very happy. Sometimes the Joy is hidden deep down inside because it is nearly overwhelmed by grief. But! Joy can never leave because it is the assurance of God's Promise.
I've got Joy down in my heart
Deep, deep down in my heart
J-O-Y down in my heart
Deep, deep down in my heart
Jesus gave it to me and no one can destroy it
I've got Joy down in my heart
Deep, deep down in my heart
It is part of my training to not only sing the songs with the children, but also to discuss what they mean. So I asked the children "what does it mean to have Joy?"
I ask you as well my reader. "What does it mean to have Joy?" Does it mean to always be happy all the time? That is ridiculous. No one can be happy all the time and no one can know that better than I. If you ask any of my friends who the happiest person they know is, they will probably say my name. But even I am not happy all the time. It is simply not possible to live in a world with sin and death and not be unhappy sometimes. Besides how can a Lord who commands us to "be joyful" (Psalm 149:5) also command us to "weep with those who weep" (Romans 12:15)? No, to have Joy is not to be happy all the time but this is the false idea that pervades our entire world.
My reader, you might also consider from whom the command to be Joyful comes. It comes from the Lord Jesus. Yet there are times in the Scriptures when it is readily apparent that Jesus is not happy. Even Jesus was sad, grieved, or righteously angry. He was not happy all the time. Yet He commands us to have Joy. So does this mean that Jesus commands His children to do something that was impossible for God Himself? Or is it rather that we do not fully understand what it means to have true Joy? Knowing that for the Lord "All things are possible" (Matthew 19:26) I think that we just do not fully understand what it means to have true Joy.
So I ask you again "what does it mean to have Joy"? To be honest, I have heard many explanations of it in my life and I still have not figured it out. My hope for this blog is to search for the true Joy of the Lord. But I will leave you with the explanation I gave to the children I was teaching that night. To be Joyful is to be content with your circumstances, knowing that because you have been saved by God's Grace, no matter what horrible, painful or happy things you experience here on earth, you have been promised that when you die you will be taken to Heaven, the Perfect place. Sometimes to be Joyful is to be very happy. Sometimes the Joy is hidden deep down inside because it is nearly overwhelmed by grief. But! Joy can never leave because it is the assurance of God's Promise.
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